by In an era of Sweet Brown and the “hide yo wife, hide yo kidz” guy, it doesn’t take long at all for everybody and their mother to see what is burning up the web, literally within a matter of minutes. Here are a few of the funniest, touching, and most entertaining wastes of your time online I have found that have fallen through the cracks over the years…
While the reputations of classics such as Robot Monster and Plan 9 from Outer Space are widespread, 1962’s Eegah! has woefully been mostly forgotten. When discussing the worst movie ever made, it is a crime to not include this masterpiece of bad acting, horrible singing, continuity errors, and special effects that…well, calling them “special” is accurate. I laughed my ass off through this entire film. Here is the trailer to give you a taste.
“MOST POPULAR GIRLS IN SCHOOL”
Falling under the “you have way too much time on your hands” category, this Internet creation stars a variety of Barbie and Ken dolls, along with other popular dolls (many of whom have received traumatic makeovers) transformed into a crew of foul-mouthed, backstabbing, brain-dead high schoolers. The result is like a train wreck that you pull over for so you can catch the entire show. Be warned, one of the ongoing series’ most beloved lines is “it smells like someone put a diabetic foot into a sandwich and left it in the sun.” If you are easily offended, DON’T EVEN BOTHER.
To describe one of Madonna‘s plethora of videos as being the most theatrical is a tall order, but this lost gem from 1993 is just that. The video, patterned after the 1977 film Looking for Mr. Goodbar and featuring Christopher Walken as the Angel of Death, is more a cinematic mini-musical than conventional video, with sweeping shots and (surprisingly) first-rate acting by Madonna. Unfortunately, this was released during the Erotica backlash and flopped big time. The song itself also is very intriguing, as it exposes Madonna’s disillusionment with the “sex kitten” persona that led her to a serious lifestyle change a few years later.
“MAMA DOG AND DOWN SYNDROME CHILD”
OK, the song is really cheesy, but I turn down the sound and have my faith in humanity renewed every time.
The Connels are an alternative band that had some success in the UK with their signature song, 74/75, but never made much of a dent on this side of the ocean. All I can say is the song itself wrenches emotion out of me every time I hear it, and the video is one of the simplest, most touching, and thought-provoking videos to come from the early 90s era.
I cannot accurately describe this kid. You just gotta see him. Hey, Brian Mitchell, you are wrong….you can’t deny this Ginger has soul!
If you are an animal lover you will get it. If you are not, you won’t.
A friend of mine and I discovered this clip making its way through the clubs several years ago. All I can say is this ingenious display of media-manipulation would have been a clever but colossal waste of time for someone had it not caught fire and spread everywhere in a matter of months. “I am NOT one of your faaaaaaaaaaans!!!!”
This 5-second video sums up the way I feel about life perfectly.
